Take A Toad Off

I'm a single woman who likes hiking, and I agreed to let a male friend set me up with his hiking-loving buddy -- and then he showed me his picture. I was not at all attracted. I didn't want to seem shallow (though I guess I am), so I told him to give me his info, but I never reached out. My friend keeps asking whether the guy should call me. Is it rude to say I'm not interested based on looks alone?

--No, Thanks

People who say you shouldn't judge a book by its cover won't be ending their Saturday night dodging the book's make-out attempts on their front porch. Sure, it's possible that this guy's photo doesn't entirely capture how he looks face to face. But photos are not cave drawings. If you aren't attracted to skinny blond guys, seeing a particular skinny blond guy in person is unlikely to change that. And turning down a date with a man you aren't attracted to isn't "shallow"; it's the kind thing to do -- basically breaking up before the first date instead of after he's gotten attached to you. Doing this doesn't require the whole cruel truth, just enough of the truth -- like "not really my type" -- to send him on his way. Communicate that to your mutual friend and you'll free Hiker Guy up to focus on women he might have a chance with and free yourself up to find a man who can make your heart race -- without chasing you up and down the trails with an ax.