Take A Rein Check

My husband and I are friends with several couples. He hangs out with the men of this group once a week, and I occasionally join them. Recently, for one of the guys' birthday, the plan was dinner and a movie, but when my husband got off the phone with the birthday boy, he said I wasn't invited. (None of the wives was, including the birthday boy's.) Am I wrong for feeling angry and hurt?

--Excluded

Think how angry and hurt men must feel when they're excluded from the wives' mani-pedi night. ("Hey, Frank, should I have her do Blushing Bride or Nudist Colony on my toes?") You're actually taking it personally that guys want a guys' night out? We all know men talk differently when there are no wives around. (Especially to the stripper.) You have some warped ideas about what you're entitled to as somebody's spouse. You got married, not conjoined. On the appointed evening, let your husband off his leash and smile and wave as he goes. Allowing him his freedom should leave him feeling less compelled to take it -- along with half of the house and everything you two own. If you can't quite manage to ease up, you might want to get a jump on deciding which half of your kid is your favorite and whether you'll be asking for the front or the back of the dog.