Mao Tse-Tongue

I'm a woman dating a woman who never really cooked until she met me. I'm not a professional chef -- just seriously into cooking. At first, she loved learning from me. Now, when she has me over for dinner, she gets upset when I make suggestions. I just hate to see her plan a great meal, sometimes with expensive ingredients, and have it not turn out.

--Dicey Situation

She was probably planning on serving capellini, not Mussolini. Sure, it's got to be hard to watch her violate a tomato, but maybe the "right way" to dice one is the way that doesn't break you two up. To avoid meddling, don't think of her cooking for you as cooking; think of it as an edible gift. (If it were your birthday, surely you wouldn't tail her to the mall, lecture her on what to buy, and then berate her on how she's wrapping it all wrong.) Compliment her efforts, and when you cook, you can enlist her help and show her a thing or two. Ultimately, knowing your way around the kitchen sometimes entails knowing when to stay out of it and keeping your mouth clamped shut until it's time for Mr. Fork to fly a big load of oddly rubbery mashed potatoes into the hangar.