Man Of Squeal

My brother has had a crush on this woman for a long time, but somehow the timing never worked out for them to date. A few months ago, I ran into her at a party. One thing led to another, and we ended up hooking up. Now my brother and this woman are finally giving it a go. He and I really don't have secrets from each other, so this is weighing on me, and I feel like I should tell him.

--Need To Disclose

Having sex with a woman isn't like the moon landing. There's really no need to put the word out about who got there first. In general, when you lay a piece of information on someone, it should benefit them in some way. In this case, it would be one thing if you had important supplemental information to disclose, such as "sex with this woman is best followed up with a penicillin nightcap." But the disclosure you're looking to make simply self-serves a purpose -- for you to get a load off your chest by immediately transferring it to your brother's. What's done cannot be undone, and though some men can shrug off the sex their girlfriend had with some guy before they were dating, not all can, and it's especially hard when "some guy" is one they'll be seeing at every family gathering for the next 70-some years. Sure, as the saying goes, "information wants to be free." But as with a Great Dane in heat, that doesn't mean you should just open the gate and let it out...so it can make sweet feverish love to everything in the neighborhood, starting with the neighbor's Mini Cooper.