Making Leave Last

Why do exes always make return appearances? My ex-wife showed up at my door one night after a crisis with her husband, and two ex-girlfriends came back for a fling. Most bafflingly, a girl I really fell for (who's now married) just texted me out of the blue.

--Mystified

People always want to make something out of patterns, which sometimes have meaning but often don't. If, whenever you eat a peanut, you blow up so big somebody tries to stencil Goodyear across your side, then attach a passenger cabin, it's wise to get checked out for a peanut allergy. But, just because four of your exes reappeared, you can't make pronouncements about exes in general. If this isn't a coincidence, you're either a pushover or a guy who doesn't end things ugly. (Or, maybe you have a peanut allergy.) These women probably feel they can count on you to mess around without messing things up with the man in their life. If you don't want late-night therapy calls, get caller ID. Beyond that, what's the downside? Sure, home invasions are alarming, but maybe complain when the perp's shoving a gun in your face, not pushed-up, half-naked cleavage.