Light Boor

I was on a first date, and the guy arrived at the pub before me. The waitress took my order and asked if I'd like to start a tab. I paused, and when he didn't offer, I gave her my card. He ended up buying my next two drinks, and I had a pretty good time, but thinking about it now, I'm mad he let me pay at all. After all, he asked me out.

--Rehashing

On the bright side, when the final bill came, he didn't get up and make tracks for the ladies' room. Things are really confusing now about who pays. By the end of the date, he knew it was okay to pick up the tab. But, when the waitress first came, he had a millisecond to figure out are you a feminist, will you hate him for paying, accuse him of being personally responsible for lowering the glass ceiling 10 feet? Before he could work all that out, you'd handed over your Visa and ordered your appletini. Ask yourself if you're quick to prosecute for something so minor because you go in expecting the worst. If so, you might change that, or instead of a boyfriend, you can have a grudge. And yes, the person who does the inviting should pay -- to a point. On the second date, it's nice to avoid being one of those women who, when the check comes, goes rooting around in her purse -- and pulls out a mint.