Life In The Fastened-To-Her Lane

Every woman I've ever had a relationship with has freaked over my friendships with other women. Even a relationship with someone I really loved ended because she couldn't stand my talking to and occasionally meeting up with female friends. There's nothing romantic going on with any of these friends, nor do I have any interest in anything ever happening, but explaining that is always hopeless.

--Maligned

"Love is all you need," lied the Beatles. Sure, it might start out seeming that way. You meet that special someone, butterflies whirl, Disney woodland animals break into song, and you fall into bed and see no one but each other for three to six months. Eventually, however, you start to long for contact with other humans -- not because your scruples are on the blink but because you've heard all of each other's most hilarious stories at least twice. Most couples keep sexytime activities on the restricted list, but there will be many other interests you share with friends and not each other. Hanging with these friends doesn't threaten your relationship; it enhances it, making you more interesting to each other because you aren't each other's sole mental, social, and emotional watering hole. It takes a secure woman to understand this -- one who needs you because she loves you and not because she skipped over building a self and is using you to cover up the empty slot. A secure woman accepts that there's always a risk you'll leave her but understands that the best way to guarantee you will is to make you feel bonded to her -- like a fly writhing out its last remaining hours on a strip of flypaper.