Leica Woman Scorned

My girlfriend bought me a digital camera for my birthday. Unfortunately, the one she got me lacked some features I wanted, so I returned it to the store, got the camera I wanted, and paid the difference. When I told her this, I think she was offended. Did I screw up?

--Photo-Bombed

When people say about gift-giving "it's the thought that counts," they don't mean the recipient's thought, "Did you find this in the trash?" Yes, you screwed up -- not by ultimately getting the camera you need but by making the one she gave you disappear like a witness about to testify against a drug lord. Turning the gift your partner gave you into the gift you want should be a three-step process. First, there's the effusing -- no matter how uneffusive you feel: "Wow, bat excrement!" Then there's the waiting. One day, maybe two days. And finally..."I just love my camera, honey. But there's another one that has this feature I really need -- this camera-nerd thing you couldn't have known about. Would you come with me to check it out?" By keeping her involved, the camera you upgrade to becomes, essentially, Son of Camera that she gave you. By the way, that's how you should start talking about your new camera, and fast, before you find yourself using it to take a series of forlorn all-by-myselfies to post on your soon-to-be-live Tinder profile.