Keeping A Lady Hating

My girlfriend of four years is a wonderful person I still love. And, yes, I messed up and feel terrible about it. She wanted to get married and have children, and I realized I didn't. She not only dumped me, she's calling me horrible (and untrue) things, like a liar and a fake -- weeks after telling me what a great person I am and how deeply she loves me.

--Mud

There's a good chance your girlfriend spent a substantial part of your four years together waiting for you to pop the question, and not the one that goes "So, did you get all of your stuff out of my place?" Not every woman wants The Royal Wedding and a bunch of babies, but a whole lot do, especially when they're bumping up against 30, and that shouldn't be exotic cultural knowledge for any guy. It would've been nice if you'd been speedier in figuring out that you weren't up for the husband thing. But, assuming you didn't promise you'd marry her while crossing your fingers behind your back, it isn't like you committed some sort of relationship fraud. Ultimately, it was up to your girlfriend to let you know that the stakes were marriage or bust. You can regret hurting her, but maybe take solace in no longer being with a woman who loves you so deeply and thinks so highly of you that she wants nothing less than to spend the rest of her life with you, you lying fake.