Gone With The Schwinn

I'm a 31-year-old guy, a part-time model, newly single, and scared to talk to women. Yesterday, I saw a beautiful woman checking me out at Whole Foods. I didn't know what to do, so I unlocked my bike and rode off. This happens maybe three times a week.

--Getting Ridiculous

The roof of Whole Foods will not open up while you're shopping, and a beautiful woman will not fall into your cart and say, "Oh, wow -- I've been waiting for a man like you to take me home and smear me with cruelty-free peanut butter." Sadly, this means you'll need to approach a woman, open your lips, and make words come out about something she's wearing, doing, or carrying: "Kelp steaks! They're even better than the tofu T-bone!" The way to get comfortable doing this is by actually doing this. For two weeks in a row, give yourself a weekly quota: You have to make moves on 21 women you'd be interested in dating -- three per day -- even if it takes going out expressly to find women to hit on. If you fall short one day, make it up the next. Come up with a punishment, like giving $50 to charity, should you fail to meet your weekly number. Every woman you talk to isn't going to go out with you, but you'll certainly get more dates than you do with your current strategy: "A beautiful woman is looking at me! Quick, unlock the bike and speed away!"