Casing Amy

I'm a straight man who's become friends with two bona-fide, card-carrying lesbians. One I met hiking and the other is a coworker. Dominique and Angelique (not their real names) are both very attractive. I consider each a good friend, have lunched with them, hugged them, and met their respective unattractive partners (each of whom looks like a man). I know they are not interested in men, yet I continue to have prurient thoughts about them, and find this continuing attraction to gay women confusing.

--Wrong Hots

Wait. You're a heterosexual man who has the hots for hot women who get it on with other women? Weird. And yet, there must be other men out there who feel as you do, considering the vast selection of videos titled "Hot Lesbian Action," and the paucity of titles like "Two Lesbian Soccer Moms Nuzzle On The Couch While Sharing A Bag Of Kale Chips." Guess what: You aren't attracted to gay women; you're attracted to extremely attractive women, some of whom happen to be gay. (Not surprisingly, when coming up with aliases for your friends, you reach for names that are more stripper than lady field hockey coach.) If you're content to remain a les-bro -- a straight guy who's friends with lesbians -- your lesbian friends can provide you with priceless benefits: unlimited insight into the bizarre thinking and behavior of women. Just be sure you always keep a firm grip on the bottom line: If they were into men, they'd be dating a man instead of a woman who kind of looks like one.