Bus Case Scenario

My best friend is a man for whom my feelings continue to grow. He's been stuck chasing his ex-girlfriend who lives four hours away. She sees him once a month for a booty call. I fall asleep thinking about him and daydream about him while on dates with other men. He's acknowledged that if his ex weren't in the picture, he'd explore a relationship with me. Please help.

--Longing

"IF his ex weren't in the picture...!" You can always find your way to an "if." It's fun to vacation in if-land for a moment or two -- like, if I had a TV show, I'd have a cook and a driver and a monkey to massage my feet under my desk. But, I don't have a TV show, and monkeys throw feces. And this guy doesn't want to explore a relationship with you or he'd be doing it instead of driving eight hours in hopes of servicing his ex back into a relationship with him. You can either live your life or sit around if-ing about what could be...his truck gets repossessed, and no bus lines go to ex-girlfriendville, so he looks deep into your general direction and says the words you've been waiting so long to hear: "Can I borrow your car for a coupla days?"